Actually not. I should retitle this “Everything you never knew that you would be wasting your time reading about Chinese cinema!” In case you were thinking of watching “The Curse of the Golden Flower” DON’T. it has officially been added to my top ten list of worst movies EVAR. Also in my top ten worst movies list are two other Chinese movies (in case you are wondering), The Promise and The Banquet. The Promise was actually the most expensive Chinese film ever made. Also the worst. And these aren’t enjoyably bad like Battlefield Earth was bad, these are more like “OMFG I can’t believe someone actually spent money to make this when there are starving children in Africa” bad. Now if you wanna see a good Chinese movie… well, you will have to watch an older one, cause I haven’t seen any of those lately. Even the latest Jakie Chan movie, Rob B Hood, was unenjoyable despite Jakie’s awesome moves and the incredibly cute baby. However, don’t let this past year’s poor movie selection make you think there are no good Chinese movies. Some of my favorite movies are Chinese. In fact, Chinese Odyssey 2002 is my favorite film of all time. Willow and Wayne have my copy, go over to their place and watch it (no you can’t borrow it! Do you have any idea what I had to go through to get a copy of that movie?!). Another Chinese film in my top ten is A Chinese Odyssey part 1: Pandora’s Box and A Chinese Odyssey Part 2: Cindarella, starring Steven Chow who you may know from Shaolin Soccer and Kung-fu Hustle (also enjoyable films). Actually Steven Chow has done some other fun movies, but we can’t find them with English so I won’t mention them here. Anyway, the point is good Chinese movies are out there, just not this year. Last year. Whatever.

Speaking of starving children in Africa, I saw Blood Daimond recently. Ok, so the kids weren’t starving, but they were blowing peoples heads off with AK47s which is worse. Well, maybe worse. Anyway, it was quite good I thought and highlights something that the rest of the world doesn’t know or seem to care anything about. Sometimes I see thing here that make me think China is a poor, dirty, miserable place, but when you see things like that you realize how fortunate you (and everyone else NOT in Sierra Leone, Rwanda, or most other places in Africa) are. While I’m talking about dramatic emotional movies I also saw Flight 93 recently. Now, I like to consider myself a pretty tough guy, and tough guys don’t cry… except during this movie. No really, I think it’s written somewhere that tough guys are allowed to cry during this movie. For some reason this film just got me somewhere inside. Maybe it’s the fact that it was real, really real, or that I know what I was doing at the exact moment that those people were fighting for their lives, or that it could have been me on that plane. I think that every single American should watch this movie. That even should never be forgotten. We should think about how horrible this was, then think about how horrible it was for the people in Blood Diamond or Hotel Rwanda.

So, on the topic of movies all Americans should watch, see An Inconvenient Truth. This one will make ya think, and it is really well done. I’m not a tree hugger or anything, but you had better get off your fat ass and go watch this movie…er, I mean, sit down on your fat ass and watch this movie. And THEN get off your fat ass and go jogging. Speaking of fat asses, if you haven’t seen Supersize Me yet, DO IT. While I’m on the subject of documentaries you should see, Bowling for Columbine is a well done look at how crazy some people are despite the fact that Michael Moore is a big fat ****ing idiot and I hate him. DON’T see Farenheit 911 because it might actually make you feel sympathetic toward ol’ G.W. and that certainly isn’t good because he … well, I won’t get into that, I don’t want to get arrested for being anti-american especially as I’m living in a communist country. But I hate him too (just for the record).

Wow! So I guess that is enough for today, although I was actually planning on talking about music too. Oh, I know you’re curios. Geez, okay! Fine! I’ll tell you! I recently got hooked on Billy Talent. Maybe he is old news over there in Americaland, but I like it! I’ve also been enjoying Gnarles Barkley, but I heard he has been overplayed in the US (which I wouldn’t know anything about as I’m on the other side of the planet). If you are into guitar stuff, check out Rodrigo and Gabriella. Apparently, they started out as metal junkies and somehow went acoustic with a touch of flamenco. Watch their video from David Letterman, they are freakin fantastic! Lastly I leave you with a forgotten icon of 80’s metal, Megadeth. Yea, I know they really didn’t really ‘make it’ till the 90’s, but I still consider them 80’s metal. I bought their “greatest hits” cd off the street in Indonesia and it kicks some major ass.

Boy, we covered a lot didn’t we? And look at all those links!!! That will have you merrily surfing away for hours! I think my job here is done. Peace out ya’ll, or as they say here in China “…” ok, they don’t say anything like that. But my wife is making very cute faces trying to come up with something. I’ll let ya know what she comes up with next time. Unless if forget. Heheh.

Wesley